This goes out to all the TWA ladies and the ones rocking the fades, who felt like they were on top of the world when they let go of the one worldly desire. Long hair, short hair, any type of hair. BUT then start to lose face from all the stares and jeers, not only from strangers but from family, significant others and friends. We go in thinking the most important people in our lives have our backs, when many don't really and that shit hurts. You think people follow "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" or just lie, something. Then again I rather get silence, then a obvious fake lie.
Originally I got scared of the BC and yes I did plan on long term transitioning (pffft didn't last a year). You think after 8 months I would take that whole time to think, nope! It took only a bad detangling session and one week to cut it. Consulted with some of my friends, half say do it up with enthusiasm while others were like "Uhh maybe you should wait. Are you going to...you know do anything with it? I mean...its going to be super short" and then there's those like a special person aka my bffff, bka my boy who was like "Do it up, let your soul grow" till I actually did it and he's like "Oh...it's short" <---DA FUQ?
This is how I get past all that bull. If you didn't do the BC yet, before you do make sure you research everything to styling, have a positive mindset. Be warned that there will be those close to you that will not like your hair. One thing that helps that if you have a "Not giving a fuck" attitude" which was an attitude I had when I did it. I wasn't shocked or anything. I LOVED my hair afterwards, the curls, the coils, I looooove it! If you already did your BC and facing some problems...scratch them out. If people cannot be sincere and want to say something negative. Cut them out with a sharp sword - You don't need all that nonsense in your life. If your boyfriend/girlfriend/alien acting up. Now understand, they are probably use to your hair being long, and yea it may be different for them to take it in at first. Give it a little time and it may grow on them. If not and they fill the space with negative comments all the time. They are not for you unfortunately. That's just my opinion. The only time my boyfriend had anything to say about my hair was, we took a trip to the zoo and I picked a flower and was trying to tuck it behind my ears. He yells "You don't have any hair!..." Did I cry? No. Just told him to go fuck himself and walked away. I already had stated I wasn't taking any bull from anyone, that includes him. Slowly he's starting to like my hair as my curls are coming out more. He likes to ask and see if he can touch since he likes the softness.
There are ways to boost up confidence in your hair such as...buying hair accessories or jewelry! Go out and buy some pretty bows, but some nice earrings. Try out some nice makeup, spice up those eyes and lips! Get a saucy outfit, new scarf, spoil yourself if you are able to with the sale rack! It's your journey and no one elses! You do you, the way your hair looks to others is not your problem. If they don't like it, then they can stop looking. God or whatever almighty power built you a body with a neck, you can turn your head to the left, right, up, down, diagonal, minute, 30 degrees north. They can look at something else. Also it's always good to blog about your journey (like I am!), join natural hair pages on Facebook, subscribe to natural ladies on YouTube. Maybe you guys may not be the same hair type, but you can always grab some ideas or work that idea into something you can twist to fit you.
Well that is all I have to say. All I can do is wish everyone the best in their natural journey. Just remember, you are not your hair. Your hair is part of you and it will grow back. Later!